The Word on the Street is John's Prefer Chickens!
"Merry Christmas Mister. Hey, Mister, do you wanna party? Are you looking for a good time on Christmas Eve? It's $10 bucks for the Globe Hotel and $20 bucks for me Mister...I've got to stop crying. Nobody's gonna buy me if I'm crying. It's bad for the John's head. It ruins his fantasy when a kid he wants to buy has tears in her eyes.
“I feel like such a jerk, working the Cameo on Christmas Eve. People look at me real quick, and then look away – except the Johns. Bruce wants me to come to church on Christmas. He says God won't mind at all. In fact, He'd like to see me there, Bruce says.
“I'd be afraid. With these clothes on! Midnight mass would never be the same! Besides, I'd never be able to sing Silent Night without Crying. Imagine me, in church, singing Silent Night. God would laugh. Before He got mad, He would laugh.
“I wish I could call my mother. It would be nice to know if she's OK. It being Christmas and all. She'd want to know what I was doing and where I was, but she already knows. And it would spoil her Christmas to know I was alive. I wonder if she'd rather think that I was dead. Maybe I wouldn't hurt her so much then.
“She could go back to thinking how it used to be on Christmas. When I was little. Before I left. Before I ruined things. Before dad...I've got to stop crying. Blue fly will be really mad if he sees me crying. Bruce says I should come to Covenant House for Christmas. The place looks great, he says. Christmas trees and presents for the kids and a big turkey dinner.
“It's hard when it's somebody else's Christmas tree. You walk around all day thinking of the time when you had one all your own. When you had a family and you got presents, and you were with people who loved you and wanted to have you around.
“It's hard to get presents from somebody you hardly know. Who you never saw before yesterday. Who are just trying to make you feel good and happy. Sometimes it just makes it worse.
“It's Christmas, and everybody wants me to be happy. Except Blue Fly! He wants me to work the Cameo porn theatre and pick up 10 Johns. Maybe they'll feel sorry for me and give me some big tips – before they go home to their own wives and kids and decorate their own Christmas trees!
“I wonder what kind of presents they're gonna give the kids at Covenant House this year. I wonder if they'd let me in again. Bruce said he would. My pimp, Blue Fly, sure won't like it. He really hassled me the last time I went to Covenant House. He beat me real bad. I don't want to go through that again!
“I sure don't want to keep doing this, either. Maybe Bruce is right and God won't get mad at me at Christmas!”